Why Do Victims Become Victimizers?

Another topic that's been on my mind for many years.  Quite often people who have been abused in some form or another end up abusing others in a somewhat similar and/or dissimilar way.  Why is this?  As in all things, abuse is relative and viewed and felt from one's personal perspective.  I think the abused may go down this path to one degree or another in order to understand what the thinking behind their perceived abuser's intentions and motivations, heart and mind were.  Because we are one, we are at a loss when someone or something takes actions towards us, that we perceive as abusive, would ever do such a thing.  Even if we might do or have done something similar or just as 'bad' to another, if done in a different context, style or degree, is perhaps where the real confusion lies?  As it is said, "people often hate in others what they hate in themselves".  And being taken out of one's comfort zone may be in some cases what really frightens.  I am sure there are many reasons why victims become victimizers, the possibilities of choices one can take is endless.  And, unfortunately, it is so easy to become jaded.  You would hope after being abused one would never want to abuse another, but sadly, that is somewhat wishful thinking.  People are complex.  Everyone has demons to exorcise and will abuse another indirectly or directly, subconsiously or consciously, intentionally or unintentionally to one degree or another.  What is common sense to me though, is that both victims and victimizers should be shown the utmost and utter compassion.

Because We are God

Because We are God
I am not afraid to die
Though this ego identity may cease to exist when this body dies
Consciousness which comes from the same single source that all consciousness comes from
Will never die

Because We are God
I have compassion, respect, honor and love for all faces of God
All forms of life, all people, how 'good' or 'bad'
Including myself

Because We are God
Is what I believe those like Jesus
Were really trying to say

Because We are God
Life has meaning
I know what Love is


Because We are God
We trudge, step by step
This daily path of sorrow and troubles, joy and insight
Always as we are
~

Feel free to add to this your 'Because We are God' thoughts. Email me them at t@southerntime.ca. If they are in the same spirit, I will post them within this blog.  I will too from time to time as inspired.  Comments are welcome too.

"Assume the Worst"

Today's thought/epiphany ~ that saying, "hope for the best, assume the worst" triggered a realization about myself of a thought pattern in which I've been entrenched for the last fifteen years ~ assuming the worst of a person's, people's, government's, corporation's, elite's interests when what really is their core motivation may be something rather relatively innocuous and even good-intentioned.
I guess it all started with the betrayal of trust with my professor who infected me with HIV and didn't tell me he was positive.  That completely shattered my world, my trust in authority and in those who said they loved me.  I became paranoid by the slightest indiscrepancy in a person's narrative, medical establishment's dogmas, political rhetoric, 'the corporate line' and news stories.  This fearfulness has not done any outright damage to me or others in regards to the 'bigger picture', ie. 'conspiracy theories', which I think is a benign fascination as long as I were to not act out in any violent fashion as in the movie 'Fight Club'.  My health was compromised because I was so anti-authority and suspicious of the medical establishment.  But it has hurt me and those I have loved most horribly and has destroyed what could have been beautiful, many times.

Ok.  I'm not saying that one should not engage in critical thinking, nor have in the realm of possibility thoughts of what might possibly, in the worst-case scenario, be a person's or organization's insidious intention.  One should be open to all realms of possibilities.  What I am saying is one shouldn't be stuck, fearing everyone, especially someone who says they love you, and think they are only out to use and abuse you.  This is not healthy and gets you nowhere in life, or love.

Speaking Truth in Love

Those of us who have the power of speaking truth to power need to speak it in equal amounts of love all the time.  Unless we do, it can have distrastrous, unintended consequences for those listening to us. We have been given a gift, we must use it lovingly.

Truth

Had an epiphany this morning.  This one's been a long time coming.  It's about lies and its opposite, truth.  I've told many lies in my past and have been told lies to by many people.  What is the nature of a lie?  What is the nature of truth?  These are questions I've been seriously pondering since I was a teen.  Now I think I've finally started to find some clarity with this issue.  I think it is to do with the human condition.  We all tell lies and we all are truthful to one degree or another.  This is where the definition of a lie and of (a) truth really begs the question.  For example, not being open about a subject in your life is a way of concealing the truth, a form of dishonesty, no?  Believing in superstition and fantasy is a way of deceiving yourself and acting on it can hurt yourself and others.  Why do humans need to be dishonest?  I think it is because of the human condition ~ we are here, we are aware and none of us know for certain wtf is going on.  We're all relatively insane.  We tell lies as form of coping with this conundrum.  One thing I do know for sure though.  Truth does set one free, and one can never grasp the whole truth.  One must seek it from a humble perspective, hearing all sides of the stories to even get a foothold in the door of truth, and freedom.